Thursday, January 14, 2010

Stir Crazy??

Lately, because of the weather, I've been stuck in the house.  But I haven't felt up to doing anything, or going anywhere.  First, I don't want to drive with all of the snow on the ground...I never used to be afraid of driving...then my accident happened about a week ago, and now I just don't want to while there is snow on the ground.  Not such a bad idea, but its been snowing nonstop since we got back from our trip.  So I have not left the house pretty much for a week.  Its rather depressing.  Then to top it off, the weather has been awful and dull and gray.  I think I may have that seasonal disorder, you know, the one that affects your mood with the weather.  I'm the type of girl that needs some sunshine.  And lately there has been NONE.  Not to mention the fact that my weight for the day also affects my mood.  I don't know why, but it really does.  Sooo, all in all, I've been really down and out lately.  I haven't felt good, and I've just felt really blah lately.  I don't want to do anything, but sit here on the couch.  So I'm going to make an appointment to see the doctor.  This isn't normal.  I used to feel soooo good, and actually feel okay to do things around the house, and now I just don't feel up to it.  Maybe I'm not feeling all that great anymore, maybe I'm getting sick, but whatever it is, I would like a Dr. to help me out a little bit.  It probably has to do with the fact that I just came back from the states as well.  That probably has a lot to do with it.  But I shouldn't feel this horrible.  I'm also extremely irratible too.  My kids are irritating me to no end.  But I know something is wrong with me, so I'm trying not to take it out on them.  I don't know what to do, but I might just go get a tanning membership to start feeling like I'm getting some sunshine.
Its really hard to diet over here.  They don't have the foods I need to buy to diet.  They don't even have SOME of the things I could use.  I mean they have no fiber one cereal, I have to special order it online.  They don't have the bread I'd like to buy.  They don't have the fruit and veggies I'd like to buy.  I'm thinking about going on this sacred heart diet...wonder if I could manage it.  Hmmm....I don't know, but its interesting.  Or maybe I'll try something else.  A friend of mine got the lap band surgery done, and its something that I'm thinking about doing when we get back to the states.  I hate feeling so overweight, its one of my biggest issues with myself.  Its one of the reasons I don't want to go out of the house.  At the same time, I constantly feel hungry, like I can't get enough food.  So, I've been thinking about it, and it may be a good option for me.  I eat well, I just eat too much, and I also enjoy working out, so I think I could be really successful with it.  Tricare will cover the costs of it, but it may take a while for them to consider me a good candidate.  For now all I can do is do what I've been doing, trying to eat well, and trying to get some exercise in.

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