Sunday, January 17, 2010

Just plain bothered....

Alright, I don't like to complain about the army, but sometimes...you gotta do, what you gotta do.
My husband came home from a deployment at the end of May last year.  We had a wonderful leave, and we found out that he was slated for BNCOC from October-Jan (missing all of the important holidays).  So he went...only 5 months after being home from a 15 month deployment, he had to go to the schooling.  I'm used to it, in a sense, but I didn't like it.  It sucked, all of my friends husbands were home.  I was lonely, I missed him.  So the girls and I decided to go out to Texas for the holidays since my husband wasn't going to be home.  Needless to say, AFTER we bought the tickets, and after he arrived, he found out that he was graduating early.  Mid Decemberish.  Soooo...we spent more money to have him go where we were going, Cozumel, and then to Texas to spend time with my family.  It was his MUCH deserved leave.  And I was sooo grateful to be able to spend some time with him.  But I don't really recommend being away from your husband for a few months and visiting family as soon as you are reunited.  It still takes time for you to get used to each other even after a few short months.  Anyway, we got back in January.  The girls and I got back before him, because the army (that doesn't make any sense whatsoever) had to have him fly from Augusta to Frankfurt, instead of from Atlanta (where we were flying him) to Frankfurt.  Sigh...not a big deal.  Then we got home.  And WHAM-here is a special detail just for you SSG Hirsch!  He's on this detail that the post is now doing.  Most people on post are doing this detail...well, except for his company only a few of them are actually doing it.  Anyway, he is at home, so I should be thankful right...well...its not exactly fun when he has to work, EVERY SINGLE DAY.  Literally all weekend...four day mind you, he has worked.  He has to pull guard duty about every other day next week, and this will go on until Feb. 11th.  Can we say LAME?  Sooo, I've just been really bothered by it all.  I want to do things with my husband, I wanted to go to a pool with him and the girls this four day....didn't happen because of his work schedule.  I wanted to go to the movies...again, couldn't happen because of the work schedule.  I want to go to Poland, and Amsterdam, and hit up Berlin too before we leave...now its looking like it probably won't happen for us.  So he'll be on this detail for a month or so...then they will leave about 15 days after that for Graf, which means more training...AND he'll be away from home again.  I believe they will be there for about another month.  He'll be home sometime in April.  At that time, we get to start preparing for our leaving Germany.  Unfortunately, they don't get four days hardly ever.  So when a four day pops up, we usually like to do something as a family.  This has just been really hard on me lately.  Having to deal with it all, and deal with being over here.  I just don't like Germany, there are things that I do like, but at the same time, I'd never want to live here.  Maybe go for a visit, but had I known what I know now, I would not have volunteered to come here in the first place.  Sure we've been able to see things....every now and then.  We did get to go to Spain on vacation after he came home from Iraq, which was cool.  We've been to a few places here and there when we had a chance, but he has literally been gone so much since we've been over here, that the excursions are few and far between.  I want to travel with my husband, since thats the only thing to do over here.  But I can't.  I'm just frustrated, and needed to vent.  This is the army, and its his job.  I'm used to it to an extent.  But I am not perfect, and I get frustrated with the best of them.  But I'm also jealous that my friends and their husbands get to do things, while we sit at home because Paul has to work.  I could do things on my own, but I want to share the experiences with my husband.  And to be frank, its much easier having one parent per child so to speak.  Sigh...just my little bitch for the day.  I hope it gets better, but right now I'm just really down about a lot of things, and I had to get it out.  Hopefully I'll feel more like myself again soon.

2 comments:

  1. You have every reason to be bothered! Anyone would feel frustrated with that kind of training schedule!

    You are totally normal for thinking - "Ok! 14 month deployment is over! Now we can finally spend some time together!"

    We should TOTALLY be compensated with some sort of separation pay AND respite care for all the training time they are away while they are supposedly "HOME".

    ((HUGS)) ps - they still do Super Saturdays with CYS - I have the schedule if you want it!

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  2. Thank you! Thank you so much for telling me that its okay to be feeling the way I'm feeling. Sometimes I wonder. I know there are people out there that wouldn't empathize at all with me, but I thank you for allowing me be bothered, lol! It makes me feel better about the whole situation.
    The SS would be great if they didn't charge so much for them now. Its 64 for both girls...so we can't really afford that luxery right now. Sigh...thanks anyways though!

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