Whining...

I just feel like whining today, my kids do it, why can't I??  Again, I had great intentions this morning, I even got ready for the gym, yet again.  It started snowing, and as you know I got into an accident at the first of the year, when there was not much snow on the ground, just a patch of ice that I slide off the road with.  Fun right?  No.  So now I have this fear of driving in the snow.  It was snowing this morning, and of course, I'm too afraid of getting in yet another accident, that I didn't feel I could go to the gym, yet again this morning.  I walked my daughter to school, and have been home for about a half hour, and it stopped snowing, the sun is out a little too.  I'd love to get to the gym, but now I feel like its too late.  I like to get to the gym early, literally, right after I drop off Sierra.  Plus I already ingested a rice krispie treat...yes, I said that right.  Hey its sort of cereal, lol.  I didn't eat anything else for breakfast.  Maybe some fruit later.  And it was a small one, in the shape of a heart...awww!  (I'll post pics later).  I'm really sick of not being able to go to the gym though, I haven't gone since we got back from the states.  Part of that was just me being down about being back.  Another part had to do with the exorbitant amount of snow we were getting.  Finally last week the snow started to subside, by the weekend, I was ready to drive again.  But I don't usually go to the gym on the weekends, the gym here isn't open, at least the one I like isn't.  The other one smells funny, so I tend not to go there.  Soo, onto Monday, well I had the kids, they didn't have school.  Tuesday, I hurt my back...which is still a little sore, but doesn't hurt quite as much, and then the snow again.  Sure I could go now, but I'm making excuses and I really do have to get ready for the school's Sweet Strategies for success thing going on.  Tomorrow won't be happening probably either.  I'm supposed to sell things with my friend Lauren for the FRG.  Sigh...Friday is out too, we are going to Poland, to pick up some more Polish Pottery.  Hopefully, next Monday I can start again?  I feel like I should be putting forth more effort, but I'm definately a workout in the morning girl.  And I really really wish I had a treadmill in the house.  My videos are great (I have tons of workout videos), but I don't have enough room in the house now that we have our recliners.  This house is very small.  I honestly and truly cannot wait to get back to the states.  I feel like, things will be easier once we are there and settled.
I'm not the type of girl that hates working out.  I'm not the type of person who doesn't ever want to exercise.  I love exercising, I love the feeling I get right after a great workout.  So I'm not the type of person to make excuses.  I exercised just about every day when Paul was deployed.  I once exercised 4-6 hours a day, so its never been about the exercise.  I love it.  Everything about it.  And I know I want to do it to relieve stress too.  So why am I not trying harder?  I know I could find time somewhere in my day.  After the kids come home from school (they only go to school from 9-2, not a whole lot of time without the kids), after lunch, after my husband comes home from work.  None of that is convenient to me though.  I wish I could workout around 7 in the morning.  So thats another reason I want to get back to the states.  Paul has promised me, we could build my workout room when we get back and get settled.  First thing on my list is a treadmill.  I also want a bicycle (a real one, they have so many bike trails, and a stationary one), I want to be able to get back to the pool to swim.  I want to do so many different things, and I feel lost right now.  I feel down, and out, and like there is no point to me even trying while we are still over here.  I think that is preventing me from going ahead to the gym.  I just hope I can push through this and get my butt to the gym.  I've been gaining weight, and it needs to stop, but thats what I do when I'm down.  I eat.  I also eat when I'm stressed and bored.  Its a wonder I'm not 3,000 lbs!
I have another goal, I'd like to get back to the gym.  Starting next week, I want to go back to the gym, I want to ride on the bike for 26 miles for the week.  I want to walk at least 10 miles next week.  Those are my goals.  I'll do it, I just need to get back to the gym, with goals in mind, I will.
So, if you read this far, thank you for letting me whine!  I really do feel better now that its all off of my chest!