Monday, March 19, 2012

How am I doing?

It has been 7 months since my surgery, well about 7 1/2 months.  I wanted to update.  I started at 262.2, today, weighed in at 166.2.  Total loss so far is 96 lbs.  Wow.  That still amazes me.  My weight loss has slowed drastically.  Basically that means that I just need to workout more.  My workouts are sporadic, but my eating is getting better by the day.  I still slip, don't we all?  This isn't a magic pill, its a tool in my arsenal.  If I don't use the tool correctly I'm going to fail.  I'm still following a lower carb diet.  Mostly whole foods.  I try to seek out organic foods, and grass fed meats, or organic meats rather than anything else.  Its not exactly easy in this city to find good healthy things.  I have to travel about an hour away to get a great selection of organic foods, and grass fed meats, fresh seafood etc.  I'm still a foodie, I still LOVE foods, but I'm finding new ones to love.
One of my new favorites is a portabella pizza.  I put a little spaghetti sauce on a small portabella, some mozzarella or provolone cheese, and turkey pepperoni's (usually only 3-4).  Its delicious and very filling.  I also eat a lot of string cheese.  Organic apples with natural peanut butter is great, grapes when the sweet tooth is calling, and I absolutely love to make 'strawberry cheesecakes.'  I take one graham cracker half, put 1 tbl of regular cream cheese (more protein), depending on the size of the strawberry one half, or one whole strawberry, and top it off with some sugar free whipped cream.  Such a wonderful treat.
My kids are getting used to eating the way I do.  Without having a husband here, and just having my kids, they end up eating a lot of the same foods I do.  They get way more treats, and still get to eat basically whatever they want for their lunches, but dinners usually involve some sort of meat, eggs, or cheese, and veggies.  We are figuring it out as we go.  I haven't really craved rice, pasta or bread, but if its in front of me, I will take a bite.  So I try to just stay away from foods like that.  I ordered fajita's at a restaurant the other night, and immediately said NO to the tortilla's.  I will just eat the meats and veggies instead.
I have a great support network around me.  Others who have also gone through the surgery, or a similar one, and are going through, or have gone through the same things.  They are also more fitness minded rather than food minded....and I find myself becoming less and less food minded.  I used to worry about what to make for dinner, or what to make for breakfast, and what to do for lunch constantly.  I used to think about food constantly.  Now, its more of an after thought for me.  I can get by eating a protein bar for a meal, or even a piece of string cheese.  I constantly have nuts or a kind bar in my purse, and always bring water and sometimes crystal light with me.

Some of my new favorite products:
Quest Bars  (so far, I've only tried chocolate brownie, cinnamon roll, and strawberry cheesecake, and loved the latter two)
Click Protein Coffee (this stuff is to die for, its delicious, tastes like a latte, and gives me that coffee that I loved so much)
Kind Bars (all natural, bars with nuts, and natural flavorings, great in a crunch, but I like the mini's the best)
Crystal light energy (sometimes it tastes too sweet, but I love the boost of energy I get from it)

Things I've realized over the past few months:
Wow, did I eat a lot.  The other night, I was at dinner with a few people and looked around me.  Not only did they finish every morsel on their own plates, but they also had a half of a big appetizer.  I realized that I used to eat that much or more sometimes...WOW.
I have more energy now, to do things that I like to do, to help people.  I visited family not long ago, and was helping go through things, that used to exhaust me by the end of the day, but I had energy to spare.  I was also able to go a few places, help bring some heavy boxes in, and load up my vehicle with a bunch of heavy bags.  Its amazing the things that I can do these days.
I still have that fat chick in me though.  I have to watch out for her.  Sometimes she's still in there SCREAMING at me to get me to eat more, or eat something that I shouldn't.  For instance, I ate a part of a cannoli, and I am able to treat myself occasionally.  I wanted to eat the whole entire thing though, and I would have in the past, not sharing with anyone.  This time, I shared with my daughter, who was more than happy to share it with me, and I got a tummy ache from eating a little bit too much of it.  Lesson learned, and I have to remind myself that she's still in there, still wanting to get out.

I'm still fearful that I'll fail at this.  I'm still fearful that I will start gaining weight.  My husband is coming home from his deployment in the near future, and I'm interested in learning how to adjust our lives around each other while he is home.  Its easier when he's gone, I control everything around here.  Food as well.  When he's home, its a little harder.  He likes treats, and he likes to go out to eat and enjoy himself.  I just have to keep reminding myself to keep my head on straight.

Overall, I love my sleeve.  I love how I feel, and I am grateful to have received this surgery.  It was a last ditch effort for me.  I'd gotten desperate.  My new tummy helps me in keeping with my goals though.  It reminds me when I've eaten too much, it talks to me a lot more when I have gassier foods, and it doesn't allow me to eat like I once did.  I want to continue being successful, and I think I will.

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